A Critical Review of the Family System

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It is important to always keep a space for change to happen. And for that
discussing something without a moralistic mindset or prejudices is
important. So, here’s a take on the root of the existence of human
institutions- the family.
Why’s the generation gap considered to be an issue?
It’s the best thing that can happen to a society.
Instead of thinking about how to narrow it down, it should be widened
up. Casteism, communalism, racism, patriarchy, superstitions, gender
inequality, how do you plan to sort these problems out if the new
generation does not refuse to accept these rotten ideas?
It’s said that the older generation has been respected a lot in this nation.
But that was for a reason. Genuinely, they had some wisdom to impart.

They used to talk about truth, beauty, life, liberation, reason,
consciousness. Well, now they don’t anymore. I’ve never found anyone
talking about Ashtavakra or Nanak. So, the reason has disappeared.
How old was Swami Vivekananda, Adi Shankara, or Gautam Buddha?
They were respected because of what they had.
Now, these days elders have issues like whether that woman had a child
or not? When are you going to get married? What’s your job? What are
you wearing? Why are you not going for ‘sarkari naukri’?

Surely, you can’t be respected for that.
To get a better picture, just look at the matrimonial advertisements. All
kinds of disgusting descriptions, especially of women, are there. And
who’s publishing those ads. Surely, the father or the relative of the girl.
If you just hear men and women in this country trying to fix marriages,
it’ll sound like goats and sheep are being traded. And I pity those losers
who consider themselves to be ‘youth’ and still let their parents decide
their marriage. Are you still in your nappies? Why are you marrying
when you haven’t even grown up to be a man?


Even if women are being allowed to get educated so that their
educational qualification can be flaunted at the time of her marriage. The
real aim is to mould her to a perfect household girl. So, now along with
cooking and cleaning, another feather in the cap has been added.
Or, dowry in the name of ‘shagun’. Shagun means auspiciousness. It has
nothing to do with money. But stupidities like how 1 rupee adds value to
it goes on. And they say it’s our culture. No, it’s just your selfishness.
What if our great Modiji bans 1 rupee as well (demonetization part 2)?
Like 25p, or 50p, now don’t exist.


It is just money. Just a mode of transaction. Earlier there was the barter
system. Nowhere in the world money is worshiped, and we call
ourselves a ‘religious’ country.

But we go on believing that. Just taking part in a few formalities of 10-
15 minute pooja session every day, or going to the temple to offer milk
does not make you religious either. And that milk, too, is cow’s offering.
All we have in the name of religion and prayer are old superstitions and
rotten rituals. In the name of Shiva, Krishna, or Bhakti, people go on
doing stupid things. Read Shiv Sutras, or Gita, try to devote yourself to
the songs of Meera, but that no one does. Because then you’ll be
exposed. Indian families are against religion, not in favor of it as it looks
like.

They’ve become hypocritical. Don’t get deluded by chanting and
singing all loudly in the temples. They’re more interested in knowing
about who’s son is getting what job or whose daughter is doing what in
her life, than the finding of God. All it takes is one truly religious person
to be born in their family, saying I want to be like Vivekananda or
Meera. Then you’ll see.
Age should not be a criterion to respect someone. One gets respect by
virtue of his/her qualities.
It is not to disrespect anyone, but we’d be carrying these problems like
corpses forever if no change takes place. One needs to know the ‘why’ of
everything. We’ve been behaving like robots. We don’t have any reasons
for anything. We marry and bear children, just because everyone else
does so. Everyone in this country wants to be an IAS officer.
If college-career-job-marriage-children-family-retirement-waiting for a
heart attack, is all you’re here to do, I’d say- Get a life!
But at the core lies an institution called family. And often a question
arises.
Shouldn’t family be replaced with a new system of living now?
Especially in India, where the entire energy of youth gets sucked up in
handling the issues related to various aspects of life (controlled by
others), rather than focusing on their talent, art, or something that can

result in the progress and development of their own as well as the
country.
All the diseases whether casteism, communalism, differences,
prejudices, superstitions, patriarchal mindset, they all stem from the
family. We don’t see new ideas, investments, ventures, changing the
outlook of this nation because all families are just inspiring their
children to fulfill their unfulfilled wishes. We’re busy producing a
country of clerks. A country where everyone is greedy of power and
wants to hold some chair or position either through politics or through
competitive examinations.
It’s indeed very difficult to find a young person in this country. You can
find them in the US, Canada, Australia, Germany, UK. But here, it’s a
rarity.
And the root of all problems lies in the family, which no one even wants
to admit. It’s like a sacrilege talking against this institution. Most of the
mental problems have direct roots in the family. It’s not the stranger
walking down the street causing the disturbance. And it’s not about one
or two things. Just about everything whether it’s a lifestyle, career,
relationships, marriage, or any other sphere of life. In the name of love,
everyone seems to be just wanting to possess the other. No one allows
the person to just be himself, to explore, to learn about life. They’ve got
all their borrowed answers and beliefs.
Just giving birth to someone isn’t a special thing. It’s just a natural
process. Every animal does that too. Parenting is a special art.
Unfortunately, no one becomes qualified enough to take up the role of a
parent. Every kind of person is claiming himself to be one.
The family may have served a purpose at a certain time. But it doesn’t
seem like it’s the way forward.


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